slow down and relax!

Rush, rush, rush. That's all I did for almost 12 years. First I returned to college with 2 small children and 2 majors, then I taught Drama. But I didn't just teach- I breathed it, spent time that would have been so useful to my psychological health doing it that I didn't just work my self silly, I worked myself ill.

Relaxing is hard for many of us. Maybe TV doesn't hold you're intrest or you're not a big reader.

I read now. And watch TV. And color. And play word games. I'm not lucky I get to do these things. I need to. And, I'm guessing, so do many others. Be afraid of what will happen if you don't- I know that it has been so very difficult to regain my sense of self when my health took a trip down that road.

It takes being able to be by yourself, enjoy your own company, and let your mind slow down.

Did I mention naps- if you can fit them in- as a perfect way to refresh?

We all just have so much to do, too full of plates, obligations no one understands...

But we all have to slow down and be present or we will miss all the good stuff.

So, stop checking email on your Blackberry or IPhone, just for a little while each day and maybe you'll be able to have an eye-to-eye talk with someone, enjoy your garden, just be.

I know that is where all of life's goodness comes from. So, sit back and relax. Everything will be more that okay.

peace and love,

sunee

too darn emotional

Oh, emotions. Sometimes they get the better of us. Okay, maybe not you, but I'm very (some have even said extremely) emotional. I like to think of it as passion. I'm passionate about a lot of things.
Truth be told, I am emotional. I cry, for happy and sad, from empathy, fear, shots... Many, many-a-time this interfered with every from a peaceful family situation to my productivity and creativity. Emotions out of control, to me, are often like a bad wind storm with feelings and confusion, not to mention undue stress, flying about making a mess.

Sometimes we need to let out our emotions in a healthy way. A good cry, one in which you just let it flow, can ease our emotional excess. Exercise, meditation and making sure we're just taking basic proper care of ourselves helps relieve emotional overloads that can lead to meltdowns, freak-outs, binges or whatever we do that band-aids the feelings. That's why I firmly believe in journaling and reading affirmations.

I laugh it off, or make a joke of it, when people tell me I'm too emotional. We are who are and most sensitive people can get a wee bit overly saddened, stressed or excited. Finding healthy, comfortable, ways to use this sensitivity productively just might be the answer. But sometimes that's more than a choice.

Tools abound. A blank sheet of paper to "journal" on if you don't have a notebook or actual journal can serve as the start to releasing all those emotions before they become attack of the stress goblin. Blogging, as I have found, is another way.

Talking to people helps. Not whining and moping but honest talk helps. If there's no one you know to talk to there are many professionals who know far more than I.

Feed your soul with goodness- music, art (which we can even view online), literature or a hobby and/or skill that allows you to just relax and enjoy.

When we nourish all parts of selves, rest enough, work enough, relax enough it becomes easier to keep the emotions in check and be sensitive and emotional at appropriate times.

Believe me- I learned the hard way :)

peace and love,

sunee

staying on track

How in the world can I possibly get this done on time? There is just too much to do! Have you ever felt that way? I have. All the time. Projects seem impossible, goals seem unrealistic and the whole ordeal just becomes a big ball of stress, confusion and procrastination.

And all of this gets compounded when we're working toward something- running a race, acting, building something, writing, painting, growing a garden, dancing, playing an instrument et cetera.
So, what do we do to avoid such a mess? Goal setting. I don't mean the big, elaborate kind of goals (albeit those are important). I'm referring to bite-sized goals we can accomplish allowing us to move on to the next thing so that, viola! we can achieve our ultimate goals.

It starts with a sort of triage system. What needs attention first? Or, what can I do today, right now? We can't do everything at once so prioritizing helps break it down to realistic portions.

One goal I have is to write. That's a big, undefined goal. Rather overwhelming without direction and little goals to achieve to reach my desire- to get published. So I broke it down to writing at least a little every single day (good or not so good) until I finish the stories I want to send out.

Now, let's have a realistic moment. Life often gets in the way of our goals- even what we HAVE to do at times. People need us, emergencies happen, we get sick.

My illnesses get in the way of my productivity many a day, but I try to at least get ideas down or a few sentences on paper if that's all I've got in me. Every little bit gets us closer to our goal. We have to work with what we've got.

By breaking goals down into these bite-sized pieces we can achieve more. We don't have to be perfect today (well, we never have to be perfect, just perfectly ourselves) we just have to keep working at whatever it is.

And, by completing these little goals we can feel accomplished, satisfied and motivated to continue rather than overwhelmed, scared and immobile with stress or fear.

So let's get down to the nitty gritty of our goals and get some good stuff cooking. Triage, patience and good old fashioned hard work will get us there :)

peace and love,

sunee

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don't sweat the small stuff?

We've all heard the expression, "Don't sweat the small stuff," but that isn't always as easy as it might sound.

I'm just saying isn't it always that last little thing that takes a stressful time to a whole new level? It's, "the straw that broke the camel's back," the, "icing on the cake" so to speak.

I kind of mosey through the stressful times with my positive, look at all we have to be thankful for attitude until one tiny thing sends me to anxietyville, causing me painful flare-ups and often a good anxiety attack to go along with it.

How does that make sense, right? But we can only handle so much for so long before SNAP and however we breakdown it happens. Some of us handle stress more gracefully than others, of course.

We can keep a healthy lifestyle, dealing with each issue as it comes up. Journaling, exercise, getting enough rest and relying on whatever support system we have available is essential. Life offers too many challenges to handle all of them alone.

Since being diagnosed with my illnesses I've been studying ways to live healthier from the inside out. It's hard work- especially when he small stuff becomes so insurmountable in my mind that I feel I cannot handle any of it anymore.

That's when it's time to SLOW DOWN and look at things realistically. Do I need rest before I deal with this? Do I need help? How do I feel about it? (Where's my journal?!)

Slowing down makes the biggest difference. No wasted energy running around stressing while getting nothing done. I personally don't have that kind of energy anymore and it isn't wise to run around all kooky like a stress ball anyway.

So, even though we may initially stress the small stuff let's not let it break anything, not "the camel's back," our emotional and psychological well being or whatever groove we have going in our lives. It's just stuff, and, well, stuff happens.

peace and love,

sunee

SARK's Transformation Exper!ence is a bulging treasure chest of SARK's best healing tools!

Predicting the future

If I had a crystal ball or magical powers I might be able to see into the future. I might know where and what I'll be doing, if I'll improve physically and if money won't be such an issue in my future.

Without such future seeing abilities it all seems like projection to me. I could be wrong, and I'm wrong often, but isn't the most important time now?

First of all, projection is often filled with negative assumptions and outcomes. This creates our self-fulfilled prophecies- we've all heard someone create a situation then say, "I knew that would happen!"

I try to accept today, illnesses, bad finances and all, and not only look for the good (of which there is plenty) but also remain hopeful about what is to come. Not everyday or perfectly. I just focus on now so I don't lose it.

When my children were little I thought the time flew by even though there had been many a challenging day. I learned then that I didn't want to miss anything. Now that I'm facing illnesses I take each day slower and try to experience it without spending most of it worrying and projecting what will happen next week, month or year.

We're all too valuable to lose our days worrying about what may never come to pass. I'm not saying stop paying bills and planning for retirement. I'm saying we have no real idea what beauty tomorrow holds til we get there, so enjoy the richness of today. I would hate for you to miss it :)

peace and love,

sunee

This is huge! Best-selling author and artist SARK (aka Susan Ariel Rainbow Kennedy) has just announced that she is inviting anyone to attend the first class of Dream Boogie with SARK for free, just so you can experience "Dream Boogie" first-hand and see what it's all about, without any cost or obligation. It looks like space is pretty limited for the complimentary call, so I encourage you to reserve your spot to attend the class on Wednesday, or to request a complimentary recording of the class.

SARK has been teaching workshops all around the world for over 25 years, but Dream Boogie is actually her very first live teleclass series. It’s a dream productivity program that is packed with inspiration and innovation to help you move from dreaming to DOing. And I’m delighted to share that this eight-week program includes an interview with me, as one of SARK’s favorite “Dream DOers”. &nbs p;

In addition to the free call on Wednesday, you can enjoy some fun, free "Dream Boogie" samples, including audio snippets of my interview, plus colorful SARK videos, workbook downloads, and other funky little goodies for your dream.

guilty as charged?

Guilt. Who needs it? It serves no purpose other than to mess with our heads often lowering self-esteem and/or self-worth.

I should know. I wear guilt like a new cute dress. I take on guilt easily and deeply. Why? It's silly, isn't it? What a waste of time, energy and emotion.

So what does someone like me do to avoid carrying this ridiculous weight? No one needs it, but those of us with chronic conditions certainly can't afford such unnecessary turmoil. We have to say no to the guilt. We cannot take that on. Unfortunately, just deciding to be guilt free may not do the trick.

I haven't perfected my guilt-free living, but I've slimmed down on my in-take by feeding myself healthy thoughts and ideas. I start with affirmations. Sark's Living Juicy Daily Morsels For Your Creative Soul covers everything from giving yourself permission to Believe to the art of listening. I read from that and other books by Sark daily. (When I read through her books, I'll find another positive source of reading material. This is on-going work!)

The strongest voice we hear, of course, is our own- so positive self talk, thoughts and actions are imperative. We can't just read it and expect to feel better. We need to ACT better as well. So, when everything goes absolutely crazy at home or work or school we can't take it all on and feel guilty, stuck in a pool of emotions that are more like quicksand.

We have to realize that things happen. Sometimes, and boy do I know this, they all happen at once. That's when it's time to take a step back, breathe, and figure out a plan. Nowhere in there is there guilt time. And, you don't deserve it. If you're feeling it, maybe give yourself a time out and do some meditation or journaling and let it go. And keep letting it go until it's actually gone. For some of us this takes a little while.

If we're trying to find balance or peace in our lives than guilt has no place. If we're ill and working to get stronger and stay positive guilt has no place. If we're role models for children or teens guilt has no place. And, finally, we don't don't deserve it in our lives and guilt has no place.

Let it go and free yourself of what you cannot control. I'll be working at that right along with you :)

peace and love,

sunee

SARK's Transformation Exper!ence is a life-changing multimedia journey of healing and transformation for the splendidly imperfect!

fibromyalgia and me

Fibromyalgia can be a mystery, even for those of us living with it. Often there are new symptoms, or as I like to say, new surprises, all the time from a new type of pain to digestive troubles.

"What does it feel like?" might be the most frequently asked question I get from people I don't see often.

How do you answer that? Before fibro I had no idea some of these types of pain existed. The deep burning that radiates deep as if it's near the bone, the throbbing deep down that I can't massage out, cramping, numbness, aching et cetera

I try to skip the depressing line-up of my pain. I happen to suffer terribly and the flare ups seem to never end, so I sometimes say I'm achy breaky but I'm rolling with it. Not very mature, but I can easily slip into a serious depression if I constantly go over and over trigger points and types of pain and how bad my wrists and knees still feel and blah blah blah.

I do keep track of my pain level numerically. The 1-10 scale helps me let everyone know where I'm at- my family, my doctor, close friends. Having a good, laid back attitude doesn't mean being lazy or inattentive to my condition.

I try with great effort not to feel victimized by this chronic condition. I keep my sense of humor and I educate myself. The Complete Idiot's Guide To Fibromyalgia is a great resource. Just skimming the sections when I was diagnosed helped me find ways to reduce my fear as well as my pain.

Meditation is suggested by many sources, including the Idiot's Guide, for fibro. That quiet, sit still stuff is hard sometimes, but worth it. I also have ADHD so slowing down, breathing and letting my body relax is essential. And when I can't do that I try a Qigong.

I'm not going to lie- it is extremely difficult for me to control my pain. I take quite the medication cocktail, exercise as directed by my rheumatologist, take like a zillion hot baths (I just got new rubber ducks), read self-help books (by Sark) and I experiment with diet and supplements. I'm not just sitting around suffering.

My experience with fibromyalgia is changing my life completely. I no longer have a career and I'm not on the go 24/7. I'm not miserable either. I do get bummed out, have meltdowns, feel frustrated and all that kind of thing, but I also get excited over the little things- like finding a leopard print cane.

So, to answer the question, it feels awful. But my heart and mind and spirit keep me trudging along. I may be slower and I don't remember things quite as well, but generally I accept it. Of course, when it gets a little better I'll be a little happier, too.

peace and love,

sunee

apples and oranges

Now that I have fibromyalgia and Sjogren's Syndrome people want to explain that their pain is nowhere near the pain I experience. It's almost like they are apologizing when they complain about their pain.

In the 41 years I didn't have these conditions my headaches hurt BAD as well as my sprains and other discomforts life brings. Sometimes life just hurts.

Now I get a different kind of pain altogether. It doesn't even feel like my old pains, and as such, nothing I can compare.

I still get headaches and they still suck. I'm not one to doubt that those around me have miserable headaches or that they have another real pain. We all have real pain and we just can't compare one to the pain of another.

I've tried to make sure to let my loved ones know their hurt matters too. And, that they don't have to rationalize or justify the mention of pain with, "I know it's nothing like what you feel..."

Well, sure. I hope not. Like apples and oranges, it's a bit ridiculous to compare two completely different things- we can't compare heartbreaks but we can show sympathy, empathy and compassion.

We have enough to worry about without worrying about if our pain is bad enough to express. Maybe people just need to care more and it wouldn't be such a comparison.

In the meantime, give yourself a get well hug and I'll be wishing you good health.

peace and love,

sunee

SARK's Transformation Exper!ence is a life-changing multimedia journey of healing and transformation for the splendidly imperfect!