Every one of us believe we have a reason to be bummed out, sad, pissed off, feeling sorry for ourselves or we're carrying around a resentment.
These negative behaviors feel normal. We tend to clutch them tighter than we do a loved one. Just like stress, these behaviors can cause pain or other health problems. When we try to reach out we might feel bombarded with all of the positive sayings and expressions that might be said to me.
Although we all seem to feel one or more of the negative thinking, it's even more harmful for anyone with a serious health issue.
As someone suffering terribly from the autoimmune disease Sjogren's Syndrome (SJS)and Fibromyalgia, I have found myself living in all negative feelings.All that did was cause me more and more pain. I'm sure it is harder or worse for those who have more serious and immediate health issues. But I wish them positive thinking, gratitude and love.
Reaching out for help is a great step to rid ourselves of the negative ways we think. Reaching out to friends, a professional such as a counselor, or a support group. If we feel we need serious help, counseling may be the way to go. Support groups, for me, remind me that life is good and being grateful takes the negative edge off of us.
When we reach out we'll often be given positive affirmations to recite daily. And these seem corny. People say, "How are these simple expressions going to help me?"
Positive thinking and living starts with those expressions, and if we really examine the saying it may just start to make sense. If we let it make sense, it may be worth incorporating into our daily lives.
"Keep it simple" is an expression I've heard a lot of complaining or even making fun of it or even show anger toward it. "How can keeping it simple keep the landlord from showing up when I don't the money."
The idea behind any saying that promotes positive thinking is that we look at what is pissing us off or why we're carrying a resentment. They're designed, in my opinion, is to get us to look at our problem and see our part and then letting it go. We should remember all of the people and things we love and appreciate and be thankful.
This isn't by any means the answers to our problems, but it may get us to look at what is riling us up and to find a gentle way to handle it. Some of us may need counseling (if this is a common way of life).
Reach out to a friend and confide in him/her until you feel less of the negative behaviors. Or, join a support group. There is one for just about anything. You may find one that is similar to your needs and it could be worth checking out.
We can also start everyday saying things like I won't hold this resentment against so and so because it is keeping me from being happy. Or, I will feel gratitude rather than feeling sorry for myself or be bummed out.
I hope all of us reach out. If you need to find a support group try www.meetup.com and find people who feel the same way.
Reaching out is good for both parties. So don't be afraid to say "I really need to talk. Are you free soon?" The results will amaze you. Positivity starts with us.
peace & love,
sunee
Friday, September 9, 2011
Monday, September 5, 2011
Support
We all need support now and then. Life has a lot of bumpy roads and crazy turns. We need people to turn to.
For those of us that are coping with health issues I believe it is very important that we have group to meet with and talk about life, learn from those who have had their condition longer. By conditions I was referring to Sjogren's Syndrome (sjs), Fibromyalgia, Lupus, Rheumatoid Arthritis (ra) and whoever has a health condition.
If you do not have health issues you might be having an emotional problem and need support. Or if you're in the middle of someone's problem there are many established groups to help you. But you might prefer a smaller group.
If you have heath issues you might feel isolated. On top of that you might have chronic pain (I've always been open with the fact that I have severe pain daily). There are so many reasons we need to spend a little time with people like us. They'll understand everything you're dealing with.
Support groups help you focus on living better, yet in the group you can talk about what's on your mind. Especially if you feel your family has heard enough about your pain and other problems. Also, you might have someone who has had a condition for much longer than you, or I, have and will share wisdom and tricks and all we need to get through the day.
How do I find these wonderful support groups? Flyers at your Doctors offices, at any place like the gym or library etcetera.
If you get on your computer and go to www.meetup.com you can search for groups with your problem or condition within certain miles.
Get support. Be with people who understand and care. Learn how others coped and how they felt when things are totally off kilter and the it's out of control and you hurt (with or without a condition). It's okay to reach out. In fact it's probably better than medication.
I hope you reach out. You'll grow from this and you'll feel less isolated. Maybe you'll feel happier, like I have.
peace and love,
sunee
For those of us that are coping with health issues I believe it is very important that we have group to meet with and talk about life, learn from those who have had their condition longer. By conditions I was referring to Sjogren's Syndrome (sjs), Fibromyalgia, Lupus, Rheumatoid Arthritis (ra) and whoever has a health condition.
If you do not have health issues you might be having an emotional problem and need support. Or if you're in the middle of someone's problem there are many established groups to help you. But you might prefer a smaller group.
If you have heath issues you might feel isolated. On top of that you might have chronic pain (I've always been open with the fact that I have severe pain daily). There are so many reasons we need to spend a little time with people like us. They'll understand everything you're dealing with.
Support groups help you focus on living better, yet in the group you can talk about what's on your mind. Especially if you feel your family has heard enough about your pain and other problems. Also, you might have someone who has had a condition for much longer than you, or I, have and will share wisdom and tricks and all we need to get through the day.
How do I find these wonderful support groups? Flyers at your Doctors offices, at any place like the gym or library etcetera.
If you get on your computer and go to www.meetup.com you can search for groups with your problem or condition within certain miles.
Get support. Be with people who understand and care. Learn how others coped and how they felt when things are totally off kilter and the it's out of control and you hurt (with or without a condition). It's okay to reach out. In fact it's probably better than medication.
I hope you reach out. You'll grow from this and you'll feel less isolated. Maybe you'll feel happier, like I have.
peace and love,
sunee
Saturday, September 3, 2011
Painy daze
I have had many days that I really, really, wanted to go somewhere, go out with my husband, go for lunch and shopping with my daughter, hang out with my son or see a friend.
The reason, as we all know, is pain. On painy days we may just have to say no. Pain that is severe and often debilitating takes up our day. Our job or activity that day is to take care of ourselves.
Many of us stay in the bed, let people bring us snacks and accept help that is offered. Of course if pain strikes while you're alone it's nice to nap and watch whatever we want on TV all while enjoying quiet.
But let's be honest. Many of us do chores, help family members with what they need, squeeze in a visit with a friend, and, if we're employed it's off to work we go. (Because we're stronger than the pain.)
Painy days are the hardest days. Your hot spots throb, new places hurt, in fact, sometimes even your whole entire body.
When it gets that bad you need to pamper yourself. Painy days are about slowing down. If you're really upset that you're not at work, get comfy on the bed and do a small amount of work on your laptop. Just a little.
Painy days are the worst kind of days (though we can still find something to be grateful for) but we should be listening to our bodies everyday and we never over do it.
As for changing plans with people just tell him/her it's a paint day and you can't go outside.
peace & love,
sunee
The reason, as we all know, is pain. On painy days we may just have to say no. Pain that is severe and often debilitating takes up our day. Our job or activity that day is to take care of ourselves.
Many of us stay in the bed, let people bring us snacks and accept help that is offered. Of course if pain strikes while you're alone it's nice to nap and watch whatever we want on TV all while enjoying quiet.
But let's be honest. Many of us do chores, help family members with what they need, squeeze in a visit with a friend, and, if we're employed it's off to work we go. (Because we're stronger than the pain.)
Painy days are the hardest days. Your hot spots throb, new places hurt, in fact, sometimes even your whole entire body.
When it gets that bad you need to pamper yourself. Painy days are about slowing down. If you're really upset that you're not at work, get comfy on the bed and do a small amount of work on your laptop. Just a little.
Painy days are the worst kind of days (though we can still find something to be grateful for) but we should be listening to our bodies everyday and we never over do it.
As for changing plans with people just tell him/her it's a paint day and you can't go outside.
peace & love,
sunee
Friday, September 2, 2011
Polite responses
Whenever I (and probably you, too) run into someone or I'm in a group setting people tend to say, "How are you doing?" or, "How are you?" and so on. It's a normal and friendly greeting. So, how do those of us who have health issues respond without making the person sorry they asked in the first place?
There are several variables, of course. There might be someone who knows me very well asking. There might be someone my husband or other family members knows well asking, so they probably know I have health issues. There are people I know fairly well, so s/he might be genuinely asking. And, of course, there are those people I barely know asking.
To my good friends I tell the whole truth- details and sometimes a little venting. I need to talk about it and they don't expect a simple response. (Which is great because it gives my family a break from listening.)
To the people I hardly know I simply say, "I'm hanging in there," and then ask about how they are. This can be a tough one if you know everyone in your community because s/he probably knows you're sick with something. If they prod I say, "I'm counting my blessings," and move on. Literally. I say it was nice to see you and gracefully make my exit.
To the people I only know through family members I give him/her an update without leaving them depressed and feeling sorry for me. It's easy to tell when enough is enough by his/her body language. Too much info makes some people uncomfortable with a lack of what to reply.
If I'm seeing someone I know well but haven't seen in a while I give a gentle version of the truth. If h/she wants more details you'll know. They'll ask questions and add what they've heard etcetera.
I don't want to be downer to talk to. It was never part of my personality before and I'm not going to let be now.
Simply paying attention to his/her body language will not only stop you from being a downer, but also someone who knows when we're getting on the "too much information" highway.
Being polite can be difficult at times, but it makes me feel good. And who doesn't want that?
peace & love,
sunee
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad
There are several variables, of course. There might be someone who knows me very well asking. There might be someone my husband or other family members knows well asking, so they probably know I have health issues. There are people I know fairly well, so s/he might be genuinely asking. And, of course, there are those people I barely know asking.
To my good friends I tell the whole truth- details and sometimes a little venting. I need to talk about it and they don't expect a simple response. (Which is great because it gives my family a break from listening.)
To the people I hardly know I simply say, "I'm hanging in there," and then ask about how they are. This can be a tough one if you know everyone in your community because s/he probably knows you're sick with something. If they prod I say, "I'm counting my blessings," and move on. Literally. I say it was nice to see you and gracefully make my exit.
To the people I only know through family members I give him/her an update without leaving them depressed and feeling sorry for me. It's easy to tell when enough is enough by his/her body language. Too much info makes some people uncomfortable with a lack of what to reply.
If I'm seeing someone I know well but haven't seen in a while I give a gentle version of the truth. If h/she wants more details you'll know. They'll ask questions and add what they've heard etcetera.
I don't want to be downer to talk to. It was never part of my personality before and I'm not going to let be now.
Simply paying attention to his/her body language will not only stop you from being a downer, but also someone who knows when we're getting on the "too much information" highway.
Being polite can be difficult at times, but it makes me feel good. And who doesn't want that?
peace & love,
sunee
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad
Thursday, September 1, 2011
Scary side effects
Guilty- I read all of the side effects for every medication I'm prescribed. I know I say not to. It will just make you scared and you may not take a prescription that might help you.
I even go online and read everything, and I mean everything, about it.Will it cause heart problems? Will it make me have seizures? Could I have serious medical problems if I take it for a long period of time? Does it make me loss my hair? Is it okay to take it with the other medications I'm on?
My psychiatrist told me not to do that. The most I should do is read the ways it will help me. In other words, find out how it works and trust the doctor who prescribed it. Besides, the pharmacy will catch any negative drug interactions.
My psychiatrist also told me that the people who do the medical trials may not even have our condition. Not only that, but any headache or nausea etcetera that they're feeling that day, aside from the medication, may effect their responses to how the medication makes them feel.
I've cut down on searching the side effects. I still inform myself on the medications but I don't spend hours online finding all the sometimes ugly details.
It's very liberating to trust the experts and not look for what possibly (like one in five million) might happen. There are just too many variables.
Being sick is hard enough. I don't need a bunch of negative information to add to it. And I hope you don't either.
Just the facts, please.
peace & love,
sunee
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad
I even go online and read everything, and I mean everything, about it.Will it cause heart problems? Will it make me have seizures? Could I have serious medical problems if I take it for a long period of time? Does it make me loss my hair? Is it okay to take it with the other medications I'm on?
My psychiatrist told me not to do that. The most I should do is read the ways it will help me. In other words, find out how it works and trust the doctor who prescribed it. Besides, the pharmacy will catch any negative drug interactions.
My psychiatrist also told me that the people who do the medical trials may not even have our condition. Not only that, but any headache or nausea etcetera that they're feeling that day, aside from the medication, may effect their responses to how the medication makes them feel.
I've cut down on searching the side effects. I still inform myself on the medications but I don't spend hours online finding all the sometimes ugly details.
It's very liberating to trust the experts and not look for what possibly (like one in five million) might happen. There are just too many variables.
Being sick is hard enough. I don't need a bunch of negative information to add to it. And I hope you don't either.
Just the facts, please.
peace & love,
sunee
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad
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