reality check

Reality check.

My definition of a reality check is to seriously and objectively evaluate our lives.

Sometimes we are forced into reality checks by things that happen to us- break ups, financial problems, illness, losing a job, a friend...

I've been blogging about finding balance due to my illnesses. Those happen to be Sjogren's Syndrome, an autoimmune disease, and Fibromyalgia. The ironic thing about that is that I have not in any way practiced balance and I got called on it.

My daughter has been watching me suffering everyday and told me what was up. She expressed how much it saddened her to see me in agony and that I could prevent at least some of it by slowing down.

We all have our own limits. I didn't have any. I did whatever, whenever and after I got sick I barely slowed down. I even felt guilty when I had to cancel plans due to how I felt.

Knowing our limits makes life better. If we're past our point maybe a chore or a project needs to wait a bit. It all gets done. I've been there, I know a mental health (or physical health) break won't effect the outcome.

I am now on a different schedule. I had my reality check. I'm now about resting, asking for help, accepting help and limiting my activities to a few things a week. I don't need to go here, there and everywhere just because I no longer work. I no longer work because I need rest and relaxation, as well as taking better care of myself.

I'm not going to lie. It's difficult to completely change my ways. Yet I know that if don't I will be in miserable pain not to mention other maladies that afflict me. Still, I'm stubborn and it will be an adventure of sorts to slow me down.

So, I'm going to change my lifestyle. I'm going to rest more than go, relax and try to limit stressing out and while I'm doing that I should find time to write my short stories and start my novel (finally). I may even write a play to mix things up a bit.

So, when we are faced with huge change and it's time for a reality check let's get real.

Here's to reality! May it show us what's truly important :)

peace and love,

sunee

going with the changes

Life constantly changes. Often we can't even keep up with the changes. Yet, change can be good. And, generally speaking, we don't have much choice but to roll with the changes.

Sometimes we need to make a career change or there is a change in the family. We all understand change. But, I'm stubborn. I think I would adjust better to even a move. I know man people not only had a career change. You had to be flexible and go with it. There are vast family changes, but most of them require us to make personal changes. It isn't always a choice.

I need to change my lifestyle. I had to leave my career and now I'm home full-time. I am settling in to being home, but I'm having trouble slowing down and taking proper care of myself.

I'm sure I'm not the only one who has had an illness change their lives and their lifestyle. I'm home, but I'm not resting like I should because I feel like I should be cleaning or doing something. I have help. My kids and husband are incredibly helpful. So is my mom.

Like many people I'm just not adjusting to the changes so well. I need to slow down, even though I feel I'm in slow motion as it is. It is a bit like when you (or myself if this hasn't happened to you) find out you're in deep financial trouble. Or, the cars all broke down at once, the dishwasher or fridge is no longer working. It takes a while to let it soak in and then we have to act. We can't just pretend it didn't happen. We have to deal with it.

And so it is with me. (Or anyone who has a chronic illness, endless pain etcetera.) I have already let it sink in- though I may still be in a bit of denial. Now It's time for me to adjust to the changes. I can't send myself to the mechanic like a car or scramble to get the money to replace part of me like an appliance. I do go to the doctor and get acupuncture, but basically, the change has to come from me.

We all have to roll with the changes of life. It has to be the only way to be happy. Being stubborn hasn't gotten me anything. (By the way, I'm only stubborn about myself and what I can do. I'm easily swayed and flexible just about all the time.) I don't know what changes you're dealing with. I hope that you're able to accept what is and change accordingly.

I know I need to (finally) start changing. I need to rest more than anything else. I need to slow down as far as cleaning and doing chores. Well, I need to stop. I need to change my way of thinking so that I take care of myself primarily. My kids are almost 19 and 17, they only need mom a little. I need to say no more often and yes only when I feel well. I need to nurture myself.

I'm taking it one change at a time. We can all roll with it. Imagine how much lower our stress levels will be if we go with it. We can deal with it. We truly can.

Let's all roll with it and find more time to laugh instead of stress.

peace and love,

sunee

funks are no fun

Being in a funk is no fun. It's funky (not in a good way). You feel down, nothing holds your attention, everything gets to you...

But unfunking is fun. Getting outside and enjoying the day, for example. Today I met up with a fibromyalgia support group and we walked the path at a lovely park.

Enjoying a hobby, even if it's tough to get the motivation to get started, is satisfying. Sometimes we just need to push ourselves to get started. I replanted a plan today. I love my little garden, but while I was in my funk, I let it go.

I also did some creative writing, which always makes me feel good. But I did stare at a blank screen for a bit. I just had to push myself to get started.

When we feel funky it's hard to get out of it. We feel like we're in a hole. But there is light above and we just have to push a little to see it.

It's worth it to unfunk ourselves. We all deserve to feel happy.

oh, and please remember that National Fibromyalgia Awareness Day is May 12.

peace and love,

sunee