It's hard for me to say no. I'm a yes person.
Although that's good in many ways (ask my children) it's not always good for me.
I am learning that in order to take care of myself I need to say no to people sometimes. If you're like me, you feel obligated to say yes to every single request made of you.
Even though I'm ill people still ask me for favors. And, even though I'm ill, I still say yes way more often than I should. Like always.
Or, I feel obligated to say yes to a social event, even lunch with a friend or a phone call, when I feel my very worst.
I am starting to let people know I'm more likely to be social or helpful during the day. I haven't worked up to "no" in all circumstances that don't work for me yet. Besides, I may want to- as long as it isn't depleting me of everything I've got (which isn't hard to do).
My point is that it's okay, more than okay, to say no. We have to put ourselves first. No one else is putting us first, so we have to do it. And when we do we feel a little bit better because we aren't stretched out in a bunch of different directions.
Putting ourselves first isn't selfish. It's okay to take care of ourselves and that often means we have to say no to the requests of others, whether it is to do favors for them or to hang out when we don't feel up to it.
I know it's okay to just take care of myself. When I feel good I'm always up to seeing, or at least talking, to my friends. And if I have to say no to something, it's always for a good reason.
I guess it's just a matter of paying attention to ourselves. The people who really care about us will understand.
peace and love,
sunee
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