it's ok to say no

It's hard for me to say no. I'm a yes person. 

Although that's good in many ways (ask my children) it's not always good for me.

I am learning that in order to take care of myself I need to say no to people sometimes. If you're like me, you feel obligated to say yes to every single request made of you.

Even though I'm ill people still ask me for favors. And, even though I'm ill, I still say yes way more often than I should. Like always.

Or, I feel obligated to say yes to a social event, even lunch with a friend or a phone call,   when I feel my very worst.

I am starting to let people know I'm more likely to be social or helpful during the day. I haven't worked up to "no" in all circumstances that don't work for me yet. Besides, I may want to- as long as it isn't depleting me of everything I've got (which isn't hard to do).

My point is that it's okay, more than okay, to say no. We have to put ourselves first. No one else is putting us first, so we have to do it. And when we do we feel a little bit better because we aren't stretched out in a bunch of different directions.

Putting ourselves first isn't selfish. It's okay to take care of ourselves and that often means we have to say no to the requests of others, whether it is to do favors for them or to hang out when we don't feel up to it.

I know it's okay to just take care of myself. When I feel good I'm always up to seeing, or at least talking, to my friends. And if I have to say no to something, it's always for a good reason.

I guess it's just a matter of paying attention to ourselves. The people who really care about us will understand.

peace and love,
sunee

big problems

Life can hand us some pretty crazy stuff. Stuff that we either didn't see coming, or, maybe we just weren't paying close enough attention to see what was going on.

I am learning, rather slowly, I must admit, that it does no good to beat ourselves up over such happenings. Also, we can't run around like crazy people because of stressful situations.

I've been spending quite a bit of time in crazytown and, clearly, it has done no good for anyone involved. I have had flare-ups from my Fibromyalgia, I'm anxious, and to top it off, I'm no good to be around.

I honestly believe that we aren't given anything to deal with that we can't handle. I just forget sometimes. Not completely, just enough to get all worked up right away. Then I bring it down slowly, looking at the big picture and finding that it will all work out.

The first thing I think is that it's important to remember is to be grateful for what we do have- people, health, whatever.

Being grateful keeps things in perspective and allows us to deal with our big problems with a much lower stress level.

I have NOT enjoyed my visit to crazytown. I was spinning in circles, unclear of what was good in my life, and, as a result, becoming overwhelmed and stressed out over everyday chores and activities.

Life isn't always easy, but keeping the stress level as low as possible can help us deal with even the most challenging situations.

I plan to make a gratitude list today. I think it will put things in perspective. I hope you take the few minutes to make your own list of what you're grateful for. Then we won't bump into each other in crazytown.

peace and love,

sunee