Not all of us have a choice. I could have continued teaching, but the degree to which I suffering was ridiculous and the pain was written all over my face. And here I was thinking no one could see through my facade. After all, I used to teach acting and enjoyed acting myself.
However, there are many people with fibro that's a lot easier to manage. Fibro ranges from some discomfort and those who have bad days or flare-ups that may keep them home once in a while to serious pain daily.
But what about those who have more frequent flare-ups, but not enough to cause them to leave a career they enjoy? Not everyone has an understanding and accommodating boss/superior. There's also the money and health insurance issue.
Financial issues can force someone to suffer to get through each day. I am learning to cut back. I don't need cute new clothes all of the time. I can live without a new, designer purse. Okay, those are tough things to give up for a woman like me, I'm not going to lie. But every "sacrifice" is justified every morning, struggling to get my stiff, hurting body out of bed.
I'm sure many others haven't been able to control their pain, either. Then we are faced with working or not. I do write when I feel well enough, but that is also enjoyable. Plus, it's easier to use a computer sitting down.
Since I stopped working I've dealt with the rolling eye attitude that my daily pain kept me from working. "Did you think about going part-time?" or "You're so lucky you can stay home all day!"
I am lucky in that my husband and family support my staying home. In fact, not everyone supported my going back to work. They were right, too. The excitement of teaching at a different school, in an environment I loved, wore off as the weather started to cool and I could barely move. I cried often.
I respect those who can work through the pain, the "fibro fog" and the lack of energy that occurs. I also respect those who love their career and change their schedule or uses their vacation and sick days for flare-ups. But for some of us, it just isn't possible.
Maybe if I were tougher, ate a specific diet, got acupuncture or got a new, better medication...
Well, I take a lot of medications. A lot. And from what I read I take the best and latest medications for my conditions. Believe me, getting to stay home in horrendous pain doesn't feel so lucky. It can be lonely and frustrating. (Plus, where am I going to wear all my cute work clothes?)
When you have a disability that people cannot see many of them will make assumptions. Yet, the choice to work or not is personal and no one should make it based on what uneducated people have to say.
Taking care of ourselves is the most important thing. The choice needs to be based on your particular pain and other symptoms.
Don't worry about what other people think. Try to laugh it off. If you're in the position to make the decision currently, give some serious thought to how your body feels and your quality of life while working.
Whatever works best for you is the right choice.
peace and love,
sunee
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