It's okay

I know it stresses many of us out when we don't achieve anything that day, week, hour. I used to be an overachiever and workaholic. I enjoyed it like crazy. I felt accomplished. And I knew what I did was good.


Things change. We change occupations, we slow down, maybe we get sick.


Whatever the reasons, it's okay. We don't have to accomplish something every hour, day or week. That doesn't make us less than. It may improve the quality of our lives. Or, maybe you changed occupations to something slower paced.


In my case, I got sick. I've had a hard time learning it's okay. It's okay that I'm not accomplishments everyday. It's okay that I don't work. It's okay that I can't make dinner many days, or run errands for that manner. It's okay that I can only write somedays. 


It's okay. 


No matter what our circumstances, it's okay to stop trying to do it all. In the long run, slowing down adds only goodness to our lives.


I have had trouble appreciating this slow lifestyle. Once I stopped working I was going to write everyday. I was going to tackle household projects. I was going to cook great food every night. But it hasn't worked out that way.


And, it's okay.


I write when I can. I cook once in a while. I just rest, relax and try to show some improvement.


We have to realize that we don't have to be number one- student, employee, mother...


It's okay.


Let's just be the best we can be and let that be okay. We'll be much happier that way.


peace and love,
sunee


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Writing

When you're stuck at home in pain (or due to other reasons) it can get boring, irritating and can easily lead to Depression. We begin we feel useless at times.


If we can't get out to appreciate the beautiful summer weather there are things I do that help me feel useful. productive and not just stimulated but entertained.


I have many days when all I could do was rest and I was left with feelings of uselessness and depression.


We do have a lot of fun things at our disposal. I write. Plays, poems, short stories, and, soon, the great American novel (if you're hearing "Paperback Writer" by The Beatles we're on the same page).


I can honestly confess I am not motivated when I am in horrible pain, but on days when the pain is moderate I work on my writing. 


You don't have to be a "writer" to write. Journaling is a great start. I don't mean the "Dear Diary" kind of thing, unless you're into that, I mean draw in your journal, cut out pictures from magazines or get things from the internet. Make a recipe book, for example. A book for your relatives, with pictures that follows a story line. Or maybe a children's story for your kids or all those ones in your family. 


But if you want to write "real" stories there are kits to get you started and a million sites online with how to get your writing going with character ideas et cetera. Or write angry mail to your condition or pain.


And then there's crafting. I cannot begin to list all of the wonderful crafting hobbies there are. It's all about enjoying yourself instead of suffering and the sense of accomplishment. And many crafting hobbies are inexpensive.


We are always in control of how we respond to our circumstances. May you find something that eases the pain or problems.


peace and love,
sunee

having a "life"

After being laid up for several months I have come to a few realizations. I am imagining you're thinking, "What else would she be doing with all that time?" I agree. It took me quite a while. First I felt sorry for myself, with my heating pads and constant pain. Then I got confused about who I was now and what would, or should, I do. Then I experienced depression.


My pain has gotten worse, but I've gotten out a bit more. I'm not hitting the clubs or being a social butterfly. I've started doing things that I enjoy but are realistic for someone with Fibromyalgia and Sjogren's Syndrome. I mean tons of doctor's appointments are fun and all, but variety is nice.


I joined a positive support group. We go on short walks (at a moderate pace) and talk about life. I've been to a concert I really wanted to attend. I have had short visits with friends- long enough to be enjoyable, yet short enough not to exhaust me. I go for short walks and drives with my husband.


Everyone has to find their own way to have in their a lives while dealing with chronic pain and other conditions. I can only offer what I'm doing. But, it is really changing my attitude. I feel less isolated. I find it easier to relax when I'm not busy and I'm not as angry about my pain anymore. 


Life is good. Sometimes it feels more complicated and difficult to remember that. But, it's our job. My pain may never go away. In fact it's increasing. But I'm still here and I want a life.


And let's add in family- especially children. I don't think it's healthy to be mopey all the time and make them feel scared, confused and maybe even sick of it.


Hobbies help, too. Whatever works for you. Whatever takes you away from the stress, pain and depression. 


We can have a life. It just may not be the life we imagined. Honestly, do things ever go how we imagined, anyway?


So add a few small activities to your routine and smile. We are blessed with the life we've been given, problems and all.


May you feel happiness with your life.


peace and love,
sunee

June 30

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patience

• Patience is a virtue, right? Well, there are so many things to be patient about these days that I am starting to believe that we'll need to get our virtue elsewhere. I will, anyway.
  
  
  People get impatient with themselves and their kids, bosses and employees, friends and relatives.
  
  
  I'm am getting extremely impatient with my Fibromyalgia and Sjogren's Syndrome. I am out of patience with this severe pain. I have no patience for pain every single day. I'm impatient for remedies, relief, cures to feel normal again.
  
  
  I know all the tips and tricks for resuming patience and control. I meditate, including mindfulness meditation, I don't try to handle everything at one time. I do deep breathing, especially the 21 deep breaths to find my center and resume patience.
  
  
  I share with others how to find a balance so that they can become patient once again.
  
  
  I'm just not a particularly patient person when it comes to pain. Sometimes I am, but lately the type of pain I'm having has caused me to be all over the place emotionally and I have no more patience. The pain is making me antsy and agitated and sick and tired of the whole ordeal. But what about my family? How does all that effect them?
  
  
  I don't want to be impatient with my family members because I am in pain. I don't want to be impatient with myself or my doctors. 
  
  
  I believe it's a choice. It takes some self control and practice, but it is worth it in every sense. We're all going through something or another, whether it be financial issues, family issues, social issues or anything that agitates or saddens us.
  
  
  We often need to slow down, maybe meditate or do deep breathing before we can look at the situation clearly and find the patience to get through it. Prioritize and know it's all going to be okay. 
  
  
  I know I do.
  
  
  So, maybe patience is an important virtue.
  
  
  peace and love,
  sunee
  
  
  
  
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Of all themthings that could hav

inspiration

Although there are many things to rant and rave about, as I do often, there are so many things to celebrate and get inspiration from.


Whether we paint or make music or write or cook or anything creative there are so many sources we might overlook as inspiration. I know I do. I feel music. I cannot make music, but certain songs move me no matter how many times I hear them I feel it in my soul.


So why not write about it? Besides being a distraction from my pain, it may also distract you from negative features in your own life. 


It doesn't have to be music that moves you. It can be a poem or a painting or something you heard somebody say. We can hold on to that feeling and transform it into our creations. 


The question is: What moves you? look at it, listen to it, go out in the world and observe it, look it up on your iPad. Just look, listen and feel.


Inspiration can come from anywhere and we should seize those moments and use them. We'll feel better.


Create what moves you and we just might be moved, too. It couldn't hurt.


peace and love,
sunee

me

I feel like writing about me. Maybe someone reading this can relate.


First of all, I hate money. I know hate is a strong word. I probably should chose a less violent sounding way of communicating my feelings such as I sincerely dislike money. 


To be honest, neither can be possibly be true as I enjoy a bit of shopping. I am not a crazy buy-it-because-I- saw-it kind of shopper. I just like to buy some things that I like. I did go crazy in Target last month, spending $400 on I don't know what. I'm not the sanest person around. Ask my psychiatrist. I also like a few things that are expensive, like anything from Tiffany's, but it's not like I hit Rodeo Drive every weekend. That's reserved for special times.


I'm not even sure that's lead to my negative relationship with money. The pile of bills as we lose what we value might be a factor. 


The other major factor is that I'm expensive. Not because I go crazy in Target or like trinkets from Tiffany's. It's my Fibromyalgia and autoimmune disease Sjogren's Syndrome. I cost a small fortune. Maybe more than a small fortune. Prescriptions, co-pays, alternative treatments. I am personally pulling my family into a financial pit.


I'm a bit bitter over having two chronic pain issues going on, but that's for another day. I am very bitter over the six $45 a month perscriptions, not to mention the other 13 that range in price. 


I hate money because even though I'm losing the money battle, I wonder how do the people in worse financial situations pay for medication and treatments. Do they just suffer? 


Our world is a money hungry world and I'm a give-it-a-way sort of gal. I don't get why so many hard working people do without medical help, are losing their homes, have less than enough food to feed their families.


It bothers me. I suppose that's why I say I hate money. Or seriously dislike it. The hardest working people and the people that need it the most don't have it. I'll survive without a lot of what I have. (I'll have to have my breakdowns far from Target.) I'm just genuine concerned with how costs increase and we all have less money.


It makes you wonder.


peace and love,
sunee