Although I'm not a big fan of ranting, I feel the need to today.


Now that I'm so ill I have empathy for ill people. I really understand. I don't know if people empathize or even understand me.


I have a very aggressive autoimmune disease, Sjogren's Syndrome, as well as two others and fibromyalgia. The daily pain, numbness, loss of balance and on and on keep me from doing much of anything. Not that I'm complaining. I've settled into my new life. I never stopped going before. In 11 years of teaching and directing  I only missed five days of work. Two were for traveling to important family events.


After three years of being homebound while getting sicker and sicker, people still express to me (in a superior tone) how they could never stay home all day. They would be BOREDnand it would drive them crazy.


let me assure everyone that when you're as ill as I am you can't do anything. I don't get bored. I'm always trying to ease my severe pain, acid reflux, migraine's and the list goes on. I've had all of the fancy IV infusions and I still just get worse and worse. I hardly have time to be bored. 


I have learned to enjoy the TV, my laptop, iPad and phone, and a  decent personal library. I keep everything I'm using that day at arms length and put a few heating pads and a hot water bottle on the places that hurt the most at that time.


I like TV. I'm not ashamed to say it. I find shows with good writing and a few that are guilty pleasures. TV helps me get my mind off of the pain. It's simply this- I am too sick to work and I had no idea what it would be like to be this sick. If people want to think they're better than me because they go in to work with a cold or a sprain, let them. They wouldn't last a day with this kind of pain.


I promise to be positive next time =)


peace and love,
sunee